THE PSYCHOLOGICAL IMPACTS OF SEXUAL ABUSE EXPERIENCED BY THE MAIN CHARACTER OF K.L RANDIS’ NOVEL SPILLED MILK

The title of this research is “The Psychological Impacts of Sexual Abuse Experienced by The Main Character of K.L Randis’ Novel Spilled Milk”. This study aims to determine the psychological impact of children on sexual abuse experienced by children. This research examines the phenomena of child abuse especially for sexual abuse and aim to reveal that literary work reflects social reality. The object of this research is “Spilled Milk” This novel shows that sexual abuse against children is a relationship between a child and an older person where the child is used as a satisfying object for the sexual needs of the offender. The method of this research that is used is Descriptive Qualitative. Data were obtained from words, phrases, clauses, or sentences in primary data. Data were analyzed by literary psychology approach and psychological theory. The psychological theories that are used in this thesis are the psychological impacts of sexual abuse by SECASA. The results of the psychological impact found in novel “Spilled Milk” are fear, responsibility, guilt and shame, anger and flashback or nightmare. So, hopefully this research is expected to be able to become a reference which can provide useful information child abuse and for people to prevent the act of child sexual abuse and help the victims.


INTRODUCTION
Abuse or violence is very common in everyday life both in the family, community and peers. Abuse generally often affects people who are helpless. The case of abuse will never run out to be discussed over time. Generally abuse often occurs in children or it is called child abuse. Children become a group that is very vulnerable to abuse because children are always positioned as weak or helpless and highly dependent on adults around them. This is what makes children helpless when threatened to not tell what they experienced. The problem of child abuse is not a stand-alone problem but is influenced by several interacting factors. Child abuse is also called child maltreatment which is an action that is intentionally carried out by a parent or caregiver. In the United States, the Center for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) defines child abuse as any action or set of guardian actions or negligence by parents or other caregivers However, it is unfortunate that lately a variety of negative phenomenon or case have occurred in children, including child sexual abuse. In Indonesia every case of sexual abuse year has increased. The phenomenon of sexual abuse against children increasingly occurs and becomes global almost in various countries. And what is even more tragic is that the perpetrators are mostly from the family environment or the environment around the child, including in their own homes, schools, educational institutions, and children's social environments. Sexual abuse against children can be done in the form of sodomy, rape, and incest. Sexual abuse against children according to End Child Prostitution in Asia Tourism (ECPAT) International is a relationship or interaction between a child and an older person such as a stranger, sibling or parent where the child is used as a satisfaction object for the sexual needs of the offender. And in generally the meaning of sexual abuse itself is the act of touching or kissing the sexual organs, sexual acts or rape, showing media or pornographic objects, showing genitals and so on.
There have been many cases of sexual abuse on children, for examples as quoted from KOMPAS.COM, a resident of Sungai Pinang, Banyuasin Regency, South Sumatra, just called his name JR (42 years old) could rape his own child, TR (14 years old). This action was carried out repeatedly until her daughter became pregnant and gave birth to a baby girl. As a result of his actions, JR is now in custody in the South Sumatra Regional Police's Youth and Women Unit (Renakta), after his wife reported. JR has been on the run since January 2018. The suspect was arrested while working as a construction worker. From the results of the examination, the suspect raped TR since May 2017. Knowing the victim was pregnant and then the perpetrator immediately ran away from home because he was afraid of being judged by his own family. From the suspect's confession, JR raped his daughter when the victim often asked to get a towel after taking a bath. At that time, the intention to rape arose.
Another case, quoted from Merdeka.com, at an old age, RI (59) who was left behind by his wife had the heart to rape his own daughter since she was in junior high school. The act was carried out by RI in his home room, Peranap Subdistrict, Indragiri Hulu Regency, Riau. The victim was raped by her father from 2013 to September 2017. The perpetrators threaten not to give pocket money and the needs of the victim's school if uncovered the incident. The victim dared to tell what she had experienced to her uncle.
According to UNICEF about 120 million children worldwide or more than 100 children experience sexual abuse under the age of 20. Although the maximum age varies across definition, Child sexual abuse is most often perpetrated against girls than boys. The abusers of sexually is a person known to the victim around 30% are the family of the child most often are brothers, fathers, uncles, or cousins. And most perpetrators are family members. Victims who experience sexual abuse will certainly experience of course very suffering physically, psychologically or emotionally and socially. For who are victims of criminal acts of sexual abuse often leave adverse impacts such as depression, responsibility, fear, anger, trauma, physical disability, guilt or shame, anxiety, interpersonal isolation, somatization, shame, low self-esteem, self-destructive behavior, poor body imagery, sleep disturbance, suicide, nightmares, anorexia or bulimia, criminality in adulthood, relational or sexual dysfunction, compulsive behavior like alcoholism, drug addiction, gambling, over eating, over spending, and sexual obsession or compulsion. Retrieved from (http://www.academia.edu/1048617/Introduction to psychology regarding to child sexual abuse) Spilled Milk is the novel that portrayed the psychological impacts of sexual abuse on children through in main character. Brooke Nolan, from the time she is a little girl until her teenage years is sexually abused by her father, she isn't the only target in the family. As her siblings feel his wrath in the form of physical abuse. Her mother is disabled from a mishap at work, and there are 4 children in the household which traps her financially. She realized that her family was not normal while she was eating dinner at Paul's house, her boyfriend. It was when a young boy, Joseph, Paul's brother spilled his glass of milk and his father didn't become enraged or beat Joseph. Brooke builds strong relationships with others, mostly adults who stand by her, giving their full support as she faces the challenge of survival, and court, against her father. The fear she feels echoes through the pages of this compelling story K.L. Randis illustrations of growing up in a violent home are on the money. Her novel speaks volumes to anyone, especially those who have suffered the devastating impacts of abuse. Her words are precious and descriptive placing the reader front and center in an explosive household.
The writer chose this novel because it is interested in studying about psychological through analyzed the background of the characters and also the other reason is because it is written based on the author's own experience so that it can be taken as a life lesson about child sexual abuse problems. It is also a phenomenon that is still happening around us even all over the world. As it is portrayed in the novel the author is testified at a criminal trial against her father, who was sentenced to prison for his crime. It is important to understand any type of act that categorized as child abuse and what is the psychological impact of child sexual abuse towards the victim. By understanding this problem, it will be easier for people to prevent the act of child abuse and help the victims.
As well as previous studies that had been examined by Bagong Suyanto's book (2010) with the title Masalah Sosial Anak. In this book, Suyanto not only providing knowledge about children who are victims of child abuse and various problematic situations that they experience, but also the definition of child abuse, types of child abuse, sources and causes of child abuse, signs of child abuse and also characteristics of victims and perpetrators. And this book helps the writer to get more information about child abuse and then the second previous studies that had been examined by Omundi Nyakerario Lilian (2013) has observed the effect of child sexual abuse on Academic performance: a case of mathare constituency. This Thesis study was intended to investigate into the effects of child sexual abuse on academic performance and to eISSN : 25494155 -pISSN : 23557083 establish the effects of child sexual abuse on academic performance. The others previous studies that had been examined by Debora Mety Margareta (2010) has observed the effect of child abuse on the main character in the novel Ugly by Constance Briscoe. In this thesis, Debora wants to show the effects that occurred on Clare as the main character when he experienced violence in the novel which is based on the true story of Constance Briscoe's work. Then the last previous studies that had been examined by Abu Huraerah's book (2006) with the title Child Abuse (revised edition). In this book, Huraerah explained about the types of child abuse based on Terry E. Lawson classification such as emotional, verbal, physical and sexual abuse and also reveals various aspects related to the problem of child abuse.
Based on the background description above, the problem that the writer wants to analyze is as follows: What are the psychological impacts of sexual abuse experienced by the main character in novel Spilled Milk? Based on the problem of the study, this thesis aim: To describe the psychological impacts of sexual abuse to the main character.

Research Design
In analyzing K.L. Randis' Spilled Milk the writer used descriptive qualitative method. The method is applied by describing the data and analyzing them, related to the focus of analysis. Qualitative research method aims to summarize and describe the conditions, situations and phenomena that become social reality in society.
An initial definition provided by Denzin and Lincoln (1994) state that qualitative research is multi-method in focus, involving an interpretive, naturalistic to its subject matters. This means that qualitative research study things in their natural settings, attempting to make sense of, or interpret phenomena in terms of the meanings people bring to them.

Data and Data Source
The data source of this study is from primary data and secondary data. Primary data is from Spilled Milk novel written by K.L.Randis. This novel is published in 2013. The novel consists of 276. And then the secondary data is from books, some related article and journal in reference to further guidance. The data in the novel can be form of words, phrases, clauses or sentences.

Technique Of Collecting Data
The writer use primary and secondary source of data. Primary data is a data which directly took by the novel itself Spilled Milk by K.L. Randis. First, the writer reads the novel after that the writer selects the data which is the words, phrases, sentences in the novel that related to the problem. Then the secondary data is by gathering all the data from the library or from internet and other supporting material. After that, the writer reads and selects the data that relevant to the topic of the thesis as much as possible.

Data Analysis
The writer has combined the important data from many other sources, which have been collected and analyze them well. In analyzing K.L Randis' spilled Milk, the writer followed the procedure, there are; data collecting, data selecting, and data analyzing. The first step of analyzing the work is by re-reading the novel completely, collected some books in the library or collected some reference in the internet. The second step is to select the data which show the relevancy to sexual abuse, the impact of sexual abuse towards the victim. Through all these steps, the writer interprets and analyzes the data to achieve the objective of this thesis and then the analysis begins with explaining the relation and the arrangement of the analysis in mind onto writing and finally a conclusion can be drawn. Through this method, the writer analyzing the sentences which are related to the topic of this study about the psychological impacts of sexual abuse experienced by the main character of K.L. Randis' Spilled Milk.

RESULTS AND DISCUSSION
Children who experience sexual violence or abuse often live with fear, guilt, anger, responsibility, and flashback or nightmare. This suffering is a direct result of abuse itself and from the fact that perpetrators usually use certain threats and tricks to silence them. The types of intimidation or manipulation used by difficult child actors to tell what they experienced. These impacts will be explained into the part of the novel that can be proven.

Fear
Someone is afraid because they see, hear, or feel something that makes them feel threatened. Fear is incredibly complex. Some fears may be a result of experiences or trauma, a change in behavior, such as fleeing, hiding, or freezing from perceived traumatic events. In general, children victims of abuse often feel doubtful, or afraid to report the violence they experience. Because the offender may swear the child to secrecy and say that if they tell something bad will happen. Sexual abuse is usually accompanied by coercion, bribery or threats. No wonder when the victim revealed the rape he/she had experienced often criticized and even blamed. It can be seen the quotation below: I lifted my head and watched his gaze run over my face. He was waiting for confirmation that the secret we had was still protected, still safe. (Chapter 7,pg 50) From the passage above shows that Fear in human beings may occur in response to a certain stimulus occurring in the present, or in anticipation or expectation of a future threat perceived as a risk to body or life. The fear response arises from the perception of danger leading to confrontation with or escape from or avoiding the threat. Fear is closely related to, but should be distinguished from, the emotion anxiety, which occurs as the result of threats that are perceived to be uncontrollable or unavoidable. In the quote shows that her father told Brooke to remain silent and not talk anything about the incident. It was already the second time Brooke was treated sexually. At the second time, Brooke realized that what her father had done to her was not normal. Because when her father did it to Brooke, her father always acted as if Volume 6 Nomor 1 Tahun 2019 eISSN : 25494155 -pISSN : 23557083 nothing had happened. She couldn't process what her father was saying, she knew she wasn't crazy. How could he stand in front of her pretending nothing happened, so when she want to scream at him and tell him that he couldn't do this but she caught sight of her siblings sitting in the living room. The idea of resisting him and her siblings being his next target was unbearable. She thinks she was their protection, the only one who knew what was capable of. She didn't have a choice. She only keeps it as secret.
If mom was going to die, I had to get out before she did. I didn't have a choice. I couldn't imagine living in a house alone with Dad. (Chapter 5,pg 27) From the passage above also shows that fear is part of human's natural instinct for survival. Fear helps to realize the presence of danger so that the desire arises to stay away from protecting themselves from the danger. Of course that fear occurs when there are actions that make the victim feel threatened or feel uncomfortable being with someone. According to Hellen Ross (Simanjuntak, 1984) "Perasaan takut adalah suatu perasaan pokok dan begitu erat hubungannya dengan harkat memperahankan diri". Misalnya mempertahankan diri dari bahaya yang berasal dari luar. (Orang lain, binatang maupun benda-benda yang membahayakan)" Translated "Feelings of fear are a basic feeling and so closely related to the value of defending themselves" For example, defend yourself from danger that comes from outside like other people, animals and dangerous objects". And then Brooke pointed out that Brooke is afraid that her mother will die and she will stay with her father who had raped her for two times. And of course that makes Brooke afraid and traumatized by her father. Moreover she lives in one house with her father. With the presence of her mother at home and living together her father still dared to do treatment that is not appropriate to do with her, moreover if her mother is not at home. Maybe Brooke will be her father's target every day.

Responsibility
The abuser most likely makes the victim feel responsible for keeping the abuse a secret. The victim may even have felt like it was their responsibility to keep the family together and the burden of this responsibility interferes with experiencing a normal childhood. It is also happening to Brooke Nolan, when she has to protect her siblings so that she can't do anything and keep silent about her father raping her. She has the responsibility of looking after her sister and her brother. It can be seen the quotation below: Sexual abuse is carried out followed by threats, so the helpless victim is called a molested. This condition causes the victim to be dominated and has difficulty revealing it. However, there is not even a little bit of perpetrators of sexual abuse in children doing their actions without violence, but using psychological manipulation. The child is cheated, so the victim follows the perpetrator wishes. And also on the other hand, Victims find it hard to trust other people so that they keep the incident of sexual abuse a secret. In addition, children tend Volume 6 Nomor 1 Tahun 2019 eISSN : 25494155 -pISSN : 23557083 to be afraid to report because they feel threatened that they experiences worse consequences when reporting. This is also shown in the quotation above, with the threat from her father. It makes Brooke feel responsible for protecting her younger sister and with that the sense of responsibility make Brooke silent or keep a secret about her father who raped her with threats that her sister would not be hurt by her father and also because of the demands of Brooke the oldest child among her younger siblings. Surely the sense of responsibility to protect her younger sibling is getting stronger and even she is willing if she becomes the target of her father even though she can't do anything. She just wants to protect her sister from the danger that her father had did to her.
Brooke once invites her sister to leave home or run away from home to protect her sister and also protect herself from her father. Because every night her father is always in their room and always rubbing their back and chest, especially Brooke's back and Brooke always pretending to fall asleep when her father entered their room. So at that moment, when Kat, her sister is fast asleep, her father begin to approach her sister and sit on the edge of the bed right next to her sleeping sister. Brooke quickly protects her sister in a way Brooke jumped up, kicking her legs and using her arms to hit the waterbed. That is the first step of sexual abuse experienced by Brooke. But at that time Brooke couldn't tell the truth what the reason she wants to leave home because she wants to protect the good name of her family and siblings because if she tells the truth, her father must be threaten to hurt her younger siblings.

Mom couldn't protect us anymore. Even if she wanted to, she couldn't. Those white pills masked her ability to function and there was too much pain for her to notice. The heaviness of the new role I played in my family was suffocating. (Chapter 5, pg 27)
Brooke is worry that the problem be even enlarged if she reports or tells about her sexual abuse, and make a 'disgrace' for her family especially when she knows that her mother could not be able to protect them again because of illness and her sense of responsibility towards her family when her mother could not take care of her and her younger siblings because of illness and her intention to leave home is stopped by her mother. Her mother asks to stay and keep her younger siblings at home. Because her mother knows only Brooke could protect her younger siblings because she is the oldest child among her younger siblings. Brooke has the duty as the oldest sister and has a very important new role in their family now and she must be a shield for her younger siblings if she leaves home or leaves her sister in their house. Brooke must have thought who would protect her younger siblings if not her. And then makes Brooke stay at home with her family and also her father to be able to protect her younger siblings from the threat of her father. Although her father's threat is not directly said by her father but with a sense of caring and a sense of responsibility towards her family Brooke understand what on her father's mind. And with this sense of responsibility, Brooke keeps a secret until Brooke is 16 years old. For years Brooke keeps the secret alone since she is 12 years old.

Guilt and Shame
The victim of sexual abuse knows about shame. They have likely been plagued by it all their life without identifying it as shame. While those who were sexually abused tend to suffer from Volume 6 Nomor 1 Tahun 2019 eISSN : 25494155 -pISSN : 23557083 the most shame and blame themselves as well. In the case of child sexual abuse, no matter how many times child have heard the words "It's not your fault," the chances are high that they still blame their-selves in some way. Children tend to blame of the neglect and abuse they experience on themselves. It can be seen the quotation below: Lou and Gina had their arms around me "Don't you dare be ashamed" Gina's voice was strong through her tears. "This is not your fault. Come here, oh let me hold you. It's okay, it's okay" (Chapter 16,pg 127) Victim feels embarrassed to tell the events of their sexual abuse, children feel that the incident of sexual abuse occurred because of his/her mistakes and sexual abuse makes children feel that they are embarrassing their family's name. The impact of sexual abuse that occurs indicates powerlessness, where the victim feels helpless and tormented when revealing the sexual abuse event. And this happens when Brooke tries to tell the events experienced by her. Her aunt and uncle gently persuade her to make Brooke open to them so she will tell all the events they have heard whether the incident is true or not. And also they make or convince Brooke to be comfortable with them so Brooke feels safe if she tells them everything. Brooke receives support from her uncle and aunt to protect her from her father. Brooke feels she will be safe with her uncle and aunt even though she tells everything.
Brooke tells her uncle and her aunt about New York, about her father coming into her room. She tells them about moving to Pennsylvania and how it happens more frequently because they didn't have family around in Pennsylvania. Then she explains how he would bring her into his bedroom and then her father pretends the next day that nothing had happened. After telling everything, Brooke feels embarrassed by herself who is no longer a virgin. She couldn't even say anything more especially when she sees the reaction of her uncle and her aunt who was devastated to see Brooke being treated by their younger brother David. After she tells the incident, Brooke sees herself as ashamed person. Indirectly, this is related to shame and disgust towards the body itself. She is ashamed of herself that she even tries to take a shower many times to get rid of the shame. She scrubs and washes every inch of her body three times, and when she thinks she is finished, she washes again. She blames herself. But all are supporting, helping and to get her father imprisoned For years, I thought that ignoring and denying what happened in our home was protecting my brothers and sister. I knew, now, that it was only enabling him. The longer I kept his secrets, the longer he could continue to do whatever he pleased. (Chapter 15,pg 114) Guilty feeling arises when the victim feels that what they are doing while covering up or keeping the sexual abuse is wrong. Moreover that guilty arises when the victim feels cheated and feels betrayed. Trust is the main basis for victims of sexual abuse. As a child having trust in parents and that trust must be understood by parents. However, children's trust and parental authority is a threat to the child. The quotation above shows that Brooke feels guilty about trusting her father that if Brooke keeps it as a secret, her father won't hurt anyone. But Brooke realizes that the longer she keeps the secret, her father increasingly threatened her and acted arbitrarily against her. After she tells everything she feels guilty all this time she has kept her Volume 6 Nomor 1 Tahun 2019 eISSN : 25494155 -pISSN : 23557083 father's secret which she should not keep. If she doesn't keep this incident a secret, maybe her father has been in jail for a long time.

Anger
Anger can occur when people don't feel well, feel rejected, feel threatened, or experience some loss. Children in case may feel anger against the perpetrator and also against others who they feel failed to protect them. And sometime anger occurs on their-selves because of their-selves can't do anything. Anger is a natural human emotion, and this is not always negative. Anger can help you knowing when you have been injured or when the situation needs to change. The important thing is that the pain experienced is unpleasant.

I failed to alert anyone I knew as to what was happening and I didn't have the strength or words to explain to anyone what was going on. Terrified, I knew now what was happening between Dad and me was not normal. (Chapter 13, pg 102)
Being a victim of sexual abuse is not an easy thing. Effects that arise can last up to the end of the victim's age. Bad feelings will come to victim repeatedly, Anger, disappointment, shame, remorse until hatred arises, not only on the offender, sometimes on the victim itself. Anger has two types, implicit anger (anger in) and explicit anger (anger out). Anger in is the form of anger in oneself which can result in depression and the emergence of hatred. While anger out is a form of anger directed at other people or destruction of objects around it. From the passage above refers to Anger in because Brooke is very angry with herself who cannot tell anyone, she fails to alert anyone that she needs help. Even she wants to get drunk and doing so unconsciously she can tell all the shame of her father who had raped her twice and hurt her sister and her brothers. Because she couldn't tell directly about her problems, Brooke wants other to recognize the change in her demeanor when everyone asks her about her father. She wants someone to ask her to tell the truth about what happen to her with the changing in her demeanor. She cannot say what she needs to say out loud on her own. She needs someone to ask. She needs someone to notice the change in her face and notice her hint. She needs someone help her.
The thought was actually a comfort. Since everything was about to come out. I didn't want to call him Dad. He didn't deserve that title. I didn't want to call him anything really, but calling him Earl would give me a reprieve when I spoke about him at least. (Chapter 17,pg 129) Violence or abuse against one parent can also cause injury and cause the child's psychological condition to be disrupted. Not only hatred, in the future the child's trust in someone (a girl who doesn't believe in men or vice versa) will increase. However, there are some things that can trigger children to have feelings of hatred towards their parents. Especially, when children feel they don't get what they can get from their parents. Actually hatred is an emotional reaction in that can be caused by feelings of anger or disappointment. And it is also happen to Brooke. Brooke's anger makes her hatred arise towards her father. Brooke's feeling of hatred towards her father is because she is betrayed and hurt by her father. eISSN : 25494155 -pISSN : 23557083 Brooke should not get the raping done by her father. As a father, he should have set a good example and protect children not destroying the child or even damaging the child's own soul which results in hatred and anger. And Brooke's hatred arises when she knows what her father did to her is not normal. Since then, Brooke doesn't want to see her father or meet her father and this hatred is shown when they are in court. Brooke doesn't want to sit next to her father or even look at her father. Because of Brooke's hatred Brooke doesn't want to call him a father. Brooke feels that after what her father had done to her, it is not a father figure. Brooke feels it is inappropriate for him to be called a father.

Flashback / Nightmare
Flashbacks are linked with PTSD (Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder). PTSD is a combination of symptoms that occur as a result of trauma. It is characterized by intrusive thoughts, nightmares, and flashbacks of past traumatic events. A flashback is when victim relieve a traumatic experience as if it is happening in the present. A flashback is when memories of a past trauma feel as if they are taking place in this current moment. That means it's possible to feel like the experience of sexual abuse is happening all over again. The nightmares and flashbacks associated with PTSD are often accompanied by increasing of anxiety and often show panic attacks.
"I can't stay there anymore, Midge. You know, I walked into the bathroom the other day and saw the toothpaste sitting on the counter." my gaze trailed off somewhere behind Midge as I remembered the panic attack that ensued. "I thought I was going to die. My heart nearly came through my chest just from looking at a tube of toothpaste, why?" (Chapter 19,pg 145) Someone who is suddenly feels anxiety and fear can be called a panic attack. Panic attack is a symptom that attacks physically and psychologically. These symptoms can occur suddenly for no apparent reason and make the person who experiences them very frightened. Physical conditions that are caused by panic attacks usually appear because they want to fight or run away from something that is perceived as a threat or fear. When under these conditions, the body needs more oxygen so that the breath becomes faster and shorter and that is also experienced by Brooke. Brooke feels a panic attack when she sees something related to her father like the quote above when Brooke sees toothpaste in the bathroom, Brooke immediately feels a panic attack where of course flashbacks about her father appears in her mind and are anxious or afraid when remembering her past or worrying and fearing it will happen again. She wants to fight the fear or anxiety she experienced but it only makes her tormented and feels she wants to die because the feels short of breath when remembering again. Sexual abuse is a type of trauma that is very scary because it affects and occurs to the victim especially if the victims are children. If this is not handled properly, it can cause PTSD, depression and anxiety for life. And that happened to Brooke. Brooke feels a tremendous anxiety. It happens every time she sees something that is related to her father. This anxiety makes her not want to stay at home because every time she sees the items that given her father. She remembers the incident that she had which is being raped by her father. The incident always interrupts her mind. The quotation above is shown about Brooke's anxiety if she continues to stay at home. She can't stay at home anymore. Even though her father will be jailed soon, the memory of her and her father together before the incident, the memory when she has been raped, the memory when she sees her siblings in pain, the memory when her family fell apart, and that memory will surely be haunted by Brooke. Even though Brooke tries to forget about the incident but when she is alone at home surely that memory haunted her life again. Some people who experience panic attacks can became aware of situations or events which can trigger them. Especially when she saw toothpaste in the bathroom, her anxiety always arises and the panic attacks always occur, fearing that it happens again.
The nightmares started almost immediately after Earl was gone. Several of them would wake me from my sleep screaming, and others I would wake up sobbing uncontrollably. Sometimes I could remember them, other times I pushed them from my mind and took a teaming shower at three in the morning to relax. The body twitches were the worst. My arms and legs would fight to keep me awake to avoid the nightmare. My limbs would spastically jolt until I would become so exhausted sleep would find me. (Chapter 19, pg 144) During a flashback it can be difficult to connect with reality. Nightmares and flashbacks keep people trapped in the trauma they survived. But nightmares and flashbacks keep her simultaneously stuck in the world of the trauma. With both, distressing memories repeatedly and disruptively intrude into the person's life and this is when the memory of a trauma is involuntarily recalled. Posttraumatic nightmares are generally defined as threatening or frightening dreams that awaken a dreamer and may be marked by any intense negative emotion, such as fear, anger, or even sadness. Every night always experienced by Brooke. She cannot sleep calmly, and continued to have nightmares and remember the incident. Feeling scared, suddenly screaming and suddenly crying uncontrollably when remembering it.

CONCLUSION
The writer has problem to be discussed. The problem is about what are the psychological impacts of sexual abuse experienced by Brooke Nolan. From the problem, it was contained in the novel Spilled Milk, the inappropriate treatment that Brooke got from her father is made a psychological impact on Brooke such as; fear, responsibility, guilt/shame, anger, flashback/nightmare.